| "Doesn't even give a fellow a chance," he whispered to Wyman
"Oh, gee, I wish the Lootenant Wyman felt a sudden depressionOther things were becoming clear now too; before, with Hearn, there had been a chanceYou'd think he'd give the underdog a break, but Croft was like a wolf"If I had the platoon," he said in his slow pompous voice, "I'd give the men a break, I'd try to be decent, appeal to better nature
"Yeah, I would too," Wyman commiseratedOnce he had been in a spot like thatHis first job after two years without one during the depression had been for a real estate agentHe had made the collectionsIt was a job he had never liked, and he had had to take a lot of abuse from tenants who resented himBut once he had been sent out to an apartment where there was an old couple who were in arrears for several months' rentTheir story had been balenciaga twiggy bag sad, like all the stories he was hearing then -- they had lost their savings in a bank crashRoth had been tempted to give them another month, but he did not dare to return to his officeHe had taken no collections that dayAnd so to hide his sympathy he had become harsh with them, and had threatened evictionThey had pleaded and he had found himself enjoying his role, elaborating the terrors of being dispossessed"I don't care where you get the money," he had said at last
Now, as he thought of it, he felt some anxiety for a moment, wished he had been kinder as if that would allay his own fateNah, he thought, that's superstitiousIt hasn't got anything to do with thisHe wondered if Croft perhaps felt the same way when he was cruel, but that was ridiculousIt's something in the past, forget it, he told himself
And Wyman was thinking of a black chanel quilted bag football game he had played once on a sandlotIt had been the team on his block against the team from another one, and he had been playing tackleIn the second half his legs had given out and he had a humiliating memory of the opposing runners cutting through his position almost at will while he had dragged himself unwillingly through each playHe had wanted to quit and there were no substitutesThey had lost by several touchdowns but there had been a kid on his team who had never given upAlmost every play that kid had been in on the tackles, yelling encouragement, getting angrier and angrier at every advance the other team made
He just wasn't like that, Wyman decidedHe wasn't the hero type, and he realized it with a suddenness and a completeness which would have crushed him months beforeNow it only made him wistfulHe would never understand men omega planet ocean watches like Croft; he only wanted to keep out of the way of themBut still, what made them tick? he wonderedWhat were they always going for?
"I hate this damn mountain," he said to RothThe mountain was so open, so highEven when he lay on his back he could not see the top of itIt just reared above him, ridge beyond ridge, and higher up it seemed made entirely of rockHe had hated the jungle, had started with terror every time an insect crawled over him or a bird chattered suddenly in the brushHe had never been able to see anything, and it had been rife with so many foul odors which choked his nostrilsThere had seemed no room to breathe, and yet now he wished he was back in the jungleIt was so secure in contrast to these naked ridges, these gaunt alien vaults of stone and skyThey would keep going up and up and there was no safety in itThe jungle omega speedmaster leather was filled with all kinds of dangers but they did not seem so severe now; at least he was used to themBut here, one misstep and it would be deathIt was better to live in a cellar than to walk a tightropeRoth plucked angrily at the grass againWhy didn't Croft turn back? What could he hope to gain?
Martinez's body achedHe was feeling a reaction from the previous night, and all morning as they had worked up the mountain he had plodded along, wretched with anxiety, his limbs trembling, his body wet with perspirationHis mind had played a few necessary tricks on him; the connection between his reconnaissance and Hearn's death was happily smudged, or at least on the surface, but ever since the second ambush he had been feeling the apprehension of a man in a dream who knows he is guilty, is waiting for his punishment, and cannot remember his cheap mulberry handbags cr |